Violations and Longings

                As I open my eyes, I felt different. I can’t say where I am. The place was filled by dark smoke and the atmosphere is eerie. I caught the sight of a person wearing a dark cape and hood. I can’t see his face. It’s dark. My foot took a step at the foggy ground and that’s when I realize, I was standing midair. I look around. The walls were familiar, also the plants. Am I at school?

                I was startled when a cold hand touched my shoulder. Turning my head, I caught the glimpse of the ‘dark man’. Upon impulse, I scooted away. For a moment, we just stared at each other. But then, he spoke.

“You may be wondering what place is this. You’ll know later,” said he.  I was confused, we?

“I will be your guide here. And don’t worry, if you’re thinking you’re dead, let me tell you. You’re not.” That sounds a bit nice. It does looks like I’m in hell.

“So let’s start the tour.” He gave me a knowing smile when he saw the hesitation in my eyes.

 “You can walk in here. You won’t fall. Also, I am not a bad person. Trust me.” His face was dark but I can see the light in his eyes. He extended his hand to me. Who is he really? I looked behind me. It was pure black clouds and fog. I decided to accept his awaiting hand.

I took small careful steps and he was patient enough to wait for me. Minutes later, we arrived at a small building by a white gate that looks like a guardhouse. I saw a familiar figure inside the small building. Our school guard? Why is he here? That’s when I noticed some teenagers with their backpacks. I jumped a little when the man beside me spoke.

“This stop was for the ‘Late Spirits’. They are students who came to school later than they should. So now, the guard is keeping them away. They can’t enter the campus premises.”

“So this is really our school,” finally my lost voice had uttered words. The dark man chuckled and started to pull my hand. As I look at him, he said,

“We’re moving on.” I just nodded and got carried away.

                The next stop was beyond the gate having some neatly uniformed officers awaiting some students. Those officers list the names of those students and, are scolding and warning them. I looked at the man beside me. He immediately understood what I mean.

“Well,” he started, “this is the ‘Lost Identities’. These students forget to bring their ID’s and were told to halt by those officers.  They only have three chances though to pass through those officers. If they made it to the fourth, their parents would be called here and judgement would be subjected by the higher ups.” I just noticed that the surroundings were a bit darker than before. I yanked his sleeves for him to look at me.

“Hey..” His head turned to me.

“Why is it that the air is black? And now, it’s darker than before,” I asked.

“That is because the sins they – the students – emit are heavier than before,” he explained. I focused my eyes in front of me and viewed the darkness awaiting me.

“Let’s go,” he declared and pulled my hand once again.

                The place is eerier than before and the chills are starting to get on my nerves. The man beside my felt my trembling body.

“Bear the cold. I can’t provide any warm blanket. I am, too, a lost soul.” When I looked at his eyes, which I can see clearer now, I see no emotion. His hand, too, now that I mention it, is cold like ice. Before I even ask him about his life, I heard a voice talking – no, more like shouting. My eyes caught a figure. An almost balding stout old man was scolding some students. Their head hang low and their eyes glued to the ground.

“Their uniforms are incomplete or messy. They are the ‘Lacking Souls’. That’s why that man there is scolding them. That’s their punishment, to be scolded continuously. Like the previous stop, they have three chances and their parents will be called at the fourth time.” He looked at me with a smile. Though not visible enough, I can see his face a bit brighter than before.

“Let’s go.”

                I figured that this will be my chance to talk to him.

“Uhm.,” I started.

“Yes? Wondering about something?”

“Well, yeah. Who are you?” He only chuckled and looked at me.

“You’ll know soon enough but not right now,” he told me.

“Can’t you tell me something about you? Even a little..,” I looked at him with pleading eyes. I just can’t come with some stranger I don’t know. And why am I even touring this stupid tour around my own school.

“Well, if you’re really curious. I am someone who appeared in your dreams..”

 “But – “

“We’re here,” he suddenly uttered. I just took that as a sign that he doesn’t what to talk about that anymore. In front of us is a one-storey building that looks like no one would ever come in.

“Let’s go inside.” I can’t stop trembling. “I am not into these kinds of places. So.. yeah…” He looked at me with a knowing smile and lightly squeezed my hand.

“I’m here.”

My eyes widen. I think I’ve already hear that words. But I couldn’t figure out where. I took all the courage left and took a step. A strong cool wind hit my face making me take a step back. Good thing, he is there to hold me.

“I’m sorry for not warning you about that wind. Be careful..” He held my hand and guided me inside. I can tell that this place is supposed to be the library but then, the books here are covered with a thick blanket of dust. No one would even touch these things though I saw some souls outside the building.

“This place is for the ‘Forgetful Ones’. They forget to return the books so they are banned to enter the buildings premises. Well, as you guessed, this is the library. The librarian is the disciplinarian here and she gives no mercy,” he told me.

“Can we go? It’s really chilly here.” I hugged myself to emphasize my words.

“Sure. Let’s go..” Once again, he offered his hand to me. Light is slowly creeping to his face but not enough to see him clearly. He guided me outside and we went on our tour. I stayed quiet throughout the journey. His hand seemed less colder than before. Not long after, we reached yet another building. This time, it has a greenish touch in it. There were railings on a terrace. The place was decorated by colourful tables and chairs.

“We are at the canteen, yes. Students here don’t pay their food. They are called the ‘Denied Buyers’. Punishment for this is to not be able to buy here and a trip to the guidance counsellor if they’ve committed a much bigger debt,” he explained. I just noticed how deserted this place is. There weren’t much of a choice in snacks. The white walls were decorated by abstract paintings and the smell is not that appealing to the nose.

“Let’s go out. You don’t seem to like the atmosphere,” he led me to the door and we continued with our journey.

The journey was to quiet for me. Personally, I don’t know what to say to him. He won’t even tell me anything about him. The feeling is very uncomfortable for me. I have absolutely no information about him but I have a feeling that he knows everything about me. That proud look in his face tells me that he knows something.

“This is the sixth stop. This stop is for the ‘Irresponsible Cleaners’. They’re students who just don’t want to clean. Look at the surroundings. They are clean as they should be. That’s because that’s their punishment, to clean everything,” he told me. I just stared at him. He just stared back and smiled.

“You seemed more quiet than usual. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I just don’t know what to say since I don’t know you,” I told him. He stayed quiet and suddenly he smiled. “You’ll know at the last stop.” That made me look up to him. “So.. Let’s carry on.” He extended his hand to me. I smiled and took his hand. Our trip started once again.

After minutes of walking, we stopped in front of a building. It was a two-storey one and it was too quiet. Just too quiet.

“This place is for the ‘Unsettled Beings’. They are too noisy for the teachers’ liking. So they made these students shut up. That’s their punishment.” He pulled my hand. “It’s too quiet in here. Let’s go.”

I can’t tell if we’re almost finished or not. But by the looks of his face, I can say that we’re close. His footsteps were faster and his hand getting warmer by the minute. I can almost see his face. Almost.

“This is the eight stop where the ‘Parasites’. They depend on others especially when it was exams. They are faced to suspension.” His bright face smiled at me and I replied with a smile, too. I really think I know this man, is what’s bugging me all this time. “After this, we’ll be at the last stop,” he declared. And so, we carried on. In just a matter of minutes, we reached the last stop.

“Here we are. The last stop. Here, the students having the heaviest violation would be subjected to either suspension or expulsion. They are what we call the ‘Black Sheeps’. The Head teacher or the principal is the one in charge of this stop.” The building was plain white with glass doors. Voices can be heard and sometimes, sobs and cries would reach my ears.. After the last stop, I yanked his sleeve. He turned to me knowing what I want…. He slowly pulled his hood revealing the face I didn’t know I’ll see again..

“Finally, you showed your face.” Tears slowly run down my cheeks. I missed you……